I Need Help....I am just sick of it

Hello friends,
Although I am not new here, I haven’t posted in this forum until now.The reason being my addiction is literally out of my control lately.I am so much ashamed to see what I have become. A pathetic excuse of a man.

I am 23 years now. Was exposed to porn at young age by some distant relatives.Curiosity got the best of me and I began to dwelve deeper in this habit.Started faping at 13/14 years old continuing till present.

Before pmo I was a very good student.I was disciplined and had good behaviors. When I started pmo I began to grow cold,my behaviors, attitude started changing. I started to change in lots of ways that people started questioning if I was okay.

At present I feel so much wasted. I feel powerless to defeat my addiction. Every time I get some streak I relapse badly again and again.Only in my 20’s I am realizing how much pmo has screwed me.Today I feel like a zombie.I don’t have any confidence, am suffering from depression anxiety and it is just worse because I have introverted personality. I wasted my teen years pmoing and the results of that I am facing now. I don’t know how to describe my situation right now ,I just can’t put it to words. I just want help whether it be advice or suggestion because I am tired of struggling alone, I am tired of failing, living like a zombie. Please help me…

P.S English is not my native language and I don’t how to express myself so please excuse my English.

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First of all , we can’t help u , u have to fight the urges and be free , u only can help yourself . when I started this journey 4 months back I couldn’t even cross a single day without PMO , and use to ask ppl for help and guidance , but nothing worked for me . I still remember I used to beat myself , and cry . In October I decided to quit this shit and made 15 days steak …

In that streak :

  1. I did regular exercise
  2. Did meditation
  3. Kept myself busy
  4. Practised yoga
  5. Drank 2-3 litres water everyday

When I broke my 15 days streak , I struggled 2 months to get back and stopped all the above listed things .

Then I decided it’s enough I don’t want this PMO in life
And again started the things I listed above , and abt to complete a week of nofap

How to control urge?
I control urge by doing meditation… It’s just requires little will power to decide to stop an urge and start meditating …

I suggest u to be regular with your schedule and practise things I have listed nice above consistently … u will do great in nofap I trust u.

U can do it :fire:

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Thanks for the advice Brother. I really appreciated it.

The thing is I have been trying to stop since 2015. At that time I wasn’t even aware of this idea that pmo was screwing my life. I would go on pmo free for some days but would relapse again and again.I also followed suggestions posted here and nofap forums.I feel motivated for some time then I feel tempted to pmo again.
The thing that scares me is I feel very lonely and depressed. I feel pathetic to see what I have become, that I did this to myself.

Whenever I feel tempted to PMO, I go to this forum and share with the Community my innermost thoughts and feelings. Also, I meditate on the negative effects PMO has had on my life and the lives of others.

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Yes…this forum is really beneficial.I have learned here so much but every time I relapse I feel worthless to come here. I feel like the worst failure to myself.So I would stop coming here only to fall to my addiction overe and over .

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Whenever you feel worthless watch some motivation videos.

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Remember…Everytime you PMO, you’re wasting your precious seed. You are losing testosterone. When you lose Testosterone you get depressed. Don’t waste your seed on worthless Pornography.

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