I lost everything

[The_Hero]

4 days ago my childhood dream girl got married and I … sorry this is the end of the story,the beginning is that .

ten years ago (or eleventh it doesn’t matter) I discovered masturbating , I heard some of my classmates taking about something related to holding di** and another things, i didn’t understand what they were taking about so i decided to try I entered the bathroom closed the door and then … I think i don’t have to complete.
I tried IT once , a single time that has grown to be hundred and thousand to be a bigger monster that has killed my dreams .

I was the kid at school the one who can solve any problem in just a second while my classmates staring at me I was going forward as a king but i didn’t think that i would face these days now.

It was like a cancer that spread on your body without feeling and then everything goes bad suddenly.

My grades getting worse day by day till my first university year I fall the year!! but what is surprising? I felt nothing, i became i careless man, but to get the truth it was a bomb waiting to
explode.

it was getting more worse till coronavirus when i tried to tell my dream girl my felling, but guess what ?? we were kinda siblings, I don’t know what is the fu**** girl thinking of boys , you are like my brother, that is it .

i was smashed like person standing between to trains smashed themselves.

the bomb has exploded but it gave me a power to start my no fap journey, playing sports, losing weight, reading books and started to go book to the KID state , 100 no FAP strike! !! it was incredible but what happened??

she get fiancee , and i can’t forgot her , i drill down my self gradually to back again to loser state.

then after three year it is her wedding.

4 days ago my childhood dream girl got married and I am totally destroyed

unemployed with abad academic background with no experiences
broken heart
obese (i gained weight again)
bad mentality
bad Brain
smashed person

i don’t know what should i do , there is know reason to complete my journey, i just want a help to lighten my path to support my broken heart .
plz support me with your chatting, I has not talk with anyone from long long time

[RedStorm47]

A long darkness known as “night” comes before a huge brightness of sunlight, known as “day”

See, this time shall pass, but it’s your decision. Stop blaming yourself and be grateful. You were born as a capable human, don’t forget that.

There’s a purpose for which we’re all here. That girl is a tiny thing in front of that purpose. Find your purpose, and do your part. Contribute to this world in some way.

Life is too short to worry. Time will be up before you realise it. So bid farewell to all negative experiences, take them as learnings. And start doing good today.

We’re often stuck in the past. Forget it. What’s happened can’t be changed.

Start living in present, because all we have is “now”.

[RedStorm47]

And stop thinking that you lost anything.

What did you bring with yourself on this earth that you lost?

What will you take from this earth together with you after you leave?

If you didn’t possess anything in the first place, what’s the point of crying? All you have is you yourself! Make yourself a weapon, and achieve the impossible using it. Sky is the limit bro, stop looking downwards.

[Binocular]

@The_Hero You want it literally? I will tell it to you literally with 100% truth:

If she can’t see the real you, if she can’t see how special you are, if she can’t love you then she doesn’t deserve even your finger nail. I’m serious

Who does she think she is? You are far greater then this, you are so far greater that she couldn’t even see you

This is not the end of you Hero, this is only the beginning. Recently, An 83 year old woman won the Nobel prize, yes, an 83 years old woman. It’s never too late for greatness warrior! You’re not even half this age.

@Surbatingsi @RedStorm47 @The_integrous_one @The_Rising_One @BlackMagic123 @yashnofap01 @anon6586404 @anon30406793 @Mahesh27_03 and a lot more Members here, we all got your back, we will always support each other, to be far greater than we could ever be. Say: “My god have mercy on my enemies, cause I won’t”

Do Nofap, Do good habits, and prove them wrong!

𝗠𝗔𝗞𝗘 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗠 𝗥𝗘𝗚𝗥𝗘𝗧!!!

[yashnofap01]

@Binocular

𝗠𝗔𝗞𝗘 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗠 𝗥𝗘𝗚𝗥𝗘𝗧!!!

Best Revenge Ever !!

[InfinitelyStrong]

Most of us are broken to some extent, bro. Everyone’s problem is different. We all are dealing with something.

More we grow up more harder life becomes. Life doesn’t get easier. We just learn to be stronger.

[Mahesh27_03]

@The_Hero

it was getting more worse till coronavirus when i tried to tell my dream girl my felling, but guess what ?? we were kinda siblings, I don’t know what is the fu**** girl thinking of boys , you are like my brother, that is it .

You are really his brother or she takes you as her brother (bro zoned) ??

If you are really his brother, please repent and apologize for your feelings. And if you are bro zoned and you really l9ve her, just respect her feelings… Love need not be accompanied with physical pleasure always. Start praying to God on daily Basis.

Learn about Brahmacharya and try practicising that…

Its never too late.

@The_Hero

unemployed with abad academic background with no experiences

So? You can still get skills. You are alive right? You are not Mentally disabled right?

I am unemployed too rn.

@The_Hero

obese (i gained weight again)

MY BMI is 26.5 currently.

@The_Hero

bad mentality
bad Brain

Both have same meanings… no one change that but you… Have you tried making to do list or schedule? Meditation?

@The_Hero

smashed person

Ohh really?

I remember a quote by Mohd. Ali that is
Its not How much you hit, Its how much get hit and then stand up again

Hope i gave the right credits but that doesnt matter.
…

So lemme tell you my story…

I was a prodigy. Could solve good book designed for Class 10 and 11 Mathematics in my Class 7.

Took up Science Biology in Class 11 due to parental pressure…
Never had the enough confidence to speak up for myself.
Got Bullied and sexually harassed as a kid.
Then tried doing the same shit with his relative…
That regret and guilt is still with me.

Tried commiting suicide thrice… First time when i was in class 5. I ran away from city to my village but the greee to see my mom last time, busted me then…

My Maa and Lord Krishna are the reason i am still alive.

Three months ago, i started quarelling for my future. They asked me to go to Russia/Ukraine for med college. I refused(never had the courange to speak in front of them).

I left the Home, came to a new city with few thousands… Spent 3 nights on roads… 10 days with just Tea and Biscuits… Did some jobs, paid advance rent and for food. Now i m unemployed for few days… But i have that intuition that my Lord Hanuman will save me and he will do everything… i will get curses for my wrong deeds. But at last everything will be fine. I will just Keep Hustling, no matter what.

And yeah, i am engaged(without my choice), plus i am in relationship with the love of my life. So yeah my life is pretty f up. But i wont give up.

Decided to marry neither of them. Will stay unmarried but commited to my gf for life. I cant marry her due to caste issues… but now idc much abt that.

And i have a roof over my head and food to eat. So its simple to fight.

“I WILL NEVER GIVE UP”

Feel free to post here. And if you want, you can DM me too.

[RedStorm47]

Damn bro

You’re a true legend! We should learn how to not give up from you!

[yashnofap01]

@Mahesh27_03

They asked me to go to Russia/Ukraine for med college

I think you should’ve applied for it.

[Mahesh27_03]

@yashnofap01

I think you should’ve applied for it.

I am done with my family TBH. I live in a joint family and most are toxic as hell. Also i cant do good with Biology. And i dont wanna invest 6 years and then… i dont think i can be a good doctor. I dont feel like doing that. I tried a lot in last 3 years afters 12th. 3 years Drop. And i dont want one more freebie from them. I am okay with struggle but i want to be answerable for my action. I am okay with 20k per month. I just need peace. 1 lakh with Suicidal Thoughts<<<<<20 k with peace and sense of independency.

And yeah it seems a good way to accept their proposal… but i cant explain all the details. I dont want to be a slave again. I didnt took this step in a day. It took me 2 full years.

[yashnofap01]

@Mahesh27_03

1 lakh with Suicidal Thoughts<<<<<20 k with peace

Glad to see this bcz nowadays people run behind money and lose their Mental health, peace and what not. You are a wise person and I wish all your decisions in life turns out to be Right !!

@Mahesh27_03

dont want to be a slave again. I didnt took this step in a day. It took me 2 full years

By reading your story I remember one of my female friend who’s going through the same scenario as you. She wanted to become a UPSC servant but her parents wanted her to be a Doctor. I hope she’ll also find a way to deal with it.

[The_Hero]

@Mahesh27_03

If you are really his brother, please repent and apologize for your feelings

No brother, it is the bro zone

[HitMo]

Sorry in advance brother if my answer is appearing harsh because it is reality and i am sharing my personal experience.

You are still thinking about these problems because actually you do not want to get out of these problems. YEAH, this is the harsh truth.

• There are more than 100 million articles on ways to make money, Why don’t you try to explore the internet for making money - It will give you a lot more ideas. Try different ideas and find your interested one - Work for free initially just for the experience, Get a job in that field, and after getting some years of experience - Apply for the next high-paying job or switch to a business if you want. Your First half problem gets solved and the rest depends upon your action.
• Broken heart? Bro, We all know that all things are perishable in the world, One day we will die. So what would happen when you die? What other people will do if you die before giving back the money you borrowed? No worries about losing your loved one. What would you do if she gets died? Nothing. So Admit the things or accept the situation that you cannot change because your father(God) knows better what is good for you or what is not good for you. First, understand the word love in detail. Love means just giving and giving - Not expecting. Just forgive here because you are in love with her. and if your love is becoming harsh hate after hearing her decision then you are in not love - It was just an attachment. The second problem gets solved if you would try to understand it deeply.
• If you gained weight then stop eating sugar and fry items. Make your diet minimal - start hitting the gym. You need a strong mindset here because many people give up here. Do 1-hour treadmill daily and you would see the difference in 3 months. You need consistency and Nofap will help you a lot to build muscle.
• Bad Mentality? Bad Brain? Smashed person: You know yourself better, Right? So give yourself time alone. Talk to yourself what do you want to do in life? What is success meant for me? Feed yourself psychologically and physically wise. The physical diet I described in the above point and mental feeding or diet is inserting the right knowledge or information by reading good books that may be self-help, business, or spiritual books. Do not scroll social media. Switch off your phone before 2 hours of sleep and do meditation daily that will keep your mind blank and calm and when you will start feeding then your old data will get cleared that is bothering you.

I hope you got the Answer

THank You
Regards
HitMo

[atentionofretention]

Don’t think about someone who actually knows you existing and treat you only as a friend and not someone with whom she wants to be as a partner. If you don’t want to be a friend of someone and want something more just do a step further.

But be a man first. No fap. Develop yourself. Know your own value as a man.

Forget this girl. Focus on yourself.

[Brez]

Ok. You had a close friendship that you wanted to take further. She didn’t want that. Did she cast you aside after that? Or is it you that has abandoned your childhood friend?
She had enough respect for you to tell you straight, without equivocation, that this was not her desire. She didn’t keep you guessing. She didn’t lead you down the garden path. That is valuable.
You asked for support but sometimes that involves being told things that you don’t want to hear. You must take this on the chin and try to be happy for your friend.
You have become too internally focused to the point where you have vanished up your own arse and you have to pull yourself out and close friends like this girl can be the best form of support. I know the feeling of unrequited love. It is terrible to endure but you have no choice but to take it.
Repair your friendship and put this behind you. Do not be like the dog in the story who loses his bone in the river because he tried to obtain a second bone that was only a mirage and be grateful for what you do have.
You didn’t do anything wrong in propositioning her and you have nothing to feel bad about in this regard so stop beating yourself up. You had the balls to confess your feelings. It didn’t work out. That’s it. No need to elaborate. Believe me, brother, that you have many, many more rejections ahead of you and it truly gets easier once you realise that it isn’t the end of the world and that you can keep on trucking, regardless. But now, YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT HAS BECOME YOUR EXCUSE TO STAY WITH YOUR ADDICTION. They are feeding each other and you won’t get rid of one unless you get rid of the other.
I don’t know where you stand with her now or if you are still in touch but if this girl truly sees you as a brother as she said then you can speak to her. You can tell her that you are struggling and why and that you need help. Maybe leave out the chronic masturbation habit, though. Do not proposition her again. Do not put her in that position. Or, failing that reconnect with others. Explain why you went off the radar and that you need help getting back to the land of the living.
Honestly, though, the key to this is to acknowledge that you are being a little bit selfish. You didn’t lose everything. You lost yourself in a labyrinth of self pity and self loathing that wasn’t justified. You didn’t get what you wanted and that’s too bad. Tough shit, my friend. Tell yourself that and give yourself a slap. You know where the exit to this labyrinth is because it belongs to you. You are the minotaur.
I may sound harsh and blunt. That’s just me. But I think you need to be told that you are somewhat out of order. You’ve wasted enough time wallowing. But look on the bright side. You’re here. You’re trying. You have acknowledged your problem and things can only get better. I wish you all the best in your efforts and I hope that you do something, anything, to get the process of healing started. We are all rooting for your success.

[Brez]

“Just forgive here because you are in love with her. and if your love is becoming harsh hate after hearing her decision then you are in not love - It was just an attachment.”

This is gold.

[atentionofretention]

To stop suffering he has to forget that girl. She is fucked by another man. For what reason he has to talk to her and be between her and her boyfriend? There is plenty of girls who are single. Making friendship with someone who he loved and can’t get is not good option. Forget her.

[HitMo]

Yeah thank you @Brez

These are the caption words below my recent Quote on love, I posted on my Instagram profile

[atentionofretention]

@Brez as you wish - i reply on your behalf -below will be my post

To stop suffering he has to forget that girl. She is fucked by another man. For what reason he has to talk to her and be between her and her boyfriend? There is plenty of girls who are single. Making friendship with someone who he loved and can’t get is not good option. Forget her.

Hello, sir. I am too new here to post any more replies on that thread so I thought that I would pm you and paste it here instead.

Maybe, maybe not. If they were as close as he says he may be able to get past it and recover a friendship. Maybe not. I believe that he needs reconciliation to draw a line under it.
But I did say, ‘Failing that…etc.’ and suggested other avenues. I don’t know how feasible this is for him. Only he knows if this is possible. Not you or I.
Having resentment towards someone who didn’t wrong you is not healthy.
She is not ‘fucked by another man’. She is married. Building a life with someone. I didn’t say he should try to win her and it doesn’t sound like he just wants to ‘fuck’ her either. Maybe this is ■■■■ brain talking?We are meant to be trying to alter this one dimensional view of women that ■■■■ has instilled in us.

Perhaps you would like to post this as a reply on my behalf? For the benefit of the OP? I understand if you don’t want to.

[atentionofretention]

@Brez

Hello madame. He is dispair becouse of her marrige. He is falling in love with her. He suffer in this case.

If he would be interesting in friendship with her then her marriage would not disrupt and he will be happy anyway. He isn’t. He is suffering. He has to forget that girl.

She is married and he don’t want to be friend with her becouse once again I say that when he wouldn’t be wanting her as a girlfriend than her marriage with another man wouldn’t be so harmful for him and even he will be happy for this. But he suffering so the best way is to forget her.

Be emotionally indifferent. There is a plenty of girls here in this world to not going to someone who is in marriage or who Don’t wants him.

“We are meant to be trying to alter this one dimensional view of women that porn has instilled in us” - this post he did is not about girl suffering but suffering man. Suffering the autor. Didn’t you notice that? He is suffering. He has to change his mind and behave like a valuable man and not chasing girl WHO don’t want nim or who chese another man not him.

We are here to help him. Not support the political correct vision of the world created by the media. Fact is that he is suffering in this case.