Hey guys am 21yrs of age and I have known nofap for a while now my longest streak being 21 days last year… after that its just been relapsing going 1wk tops !!! Am still a virgin and that’s been my fear !! That I may never have sex !! Don’t get me wrong do talk to girls but when it came to intimacy I just feared… So I would go to porn and tapping as my escape !! I’ve always wanted to have a girlfriend who would genuinely love me but I haven’t !!! This is my day one now . I have purged all porn materials and I really want to get my shit together !! I want to go hard mode 90days but I don’t know if this is the write thing to do or I should just go and actually get a girlfriend and have sex !! I need help what should I do ??
My advice is do everything you can to break free of porn and masturbstion. Focus on getting yourself put together. At the moment your brain isn’t wired to be intimate or have a legit relationship with a girl. It is wired to do whatever it needs to in order to get off again. So my advice: get away from porn, break the habit of masturbation, then you can have a relationship without thinking about sex the whole time. And don’t rush having sex, it means so much more when you find the right person.
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I don’t have any advice to give, but I just wanted to say you aren’t alone! I am also 21 and still a virgin.
Dude we had several conversations on this topic in the forum, once check them out. I personally suffered from depression due to not getting laid during day 60s. Well now I’m at day 300+, and the lust inside me is totally dead, I literally get nearby 1or2 urges max per week sometimes not even that. rn I’m super focused towards my goals. Recently got into a relationship with a girl , had a chance to lose my virginity but 1) I didn’t felt she’s the right one 2) I’m thinking about saving it for the marriage.
So don’t worry and don’t hurry, it’s just phase in your nofap cycle, you’ll get out of it. Just don’t break the streak.
Update Nov: I lost my virginity to that girl but it turns out we were not a not good fit, I did it out of lust and not love, I felt like shit… yes real shit after I did it no kidding worst than if I’d fapped I wish I could go back and never meet that B**ch again , and I broke up with her after a couple of months. And that B is the reason now I lost my Streak of over 400. I didn’t even felt like getting urges when I was on day 400 but I did it because of my fucking curious mind who was hooked up to know how it feels. TBH it ain’t even that great. I did a lot of work reaching day 400 and the urges were gone, completely, and now I’m again at 0 back to darkness and struggling.
So don’t get carried away with the thoughts of having sex, you’ll regret that or least won’t feel better, just keep on building streak and unleash the superpower inside you & make a difference. All the best
In my opinion, people put too much emphasis on sex and losing their virginity. I promise you that, although sex can be very pleasant with someone you love, it really isn’t that big a deal, and shouldn’t dominate your thoughts or your life. Your time will come, but it’ll be much better if you treat it as a small pleasantness in an otherwise enriched life - like having a nice meal on a day that is filled with things you enjoy. Try not to think of it as the main event, and you won’t be so disappointed when it happens