How to control yourself from getting sexually/physically attracted to good looking & attractive people? I need clear cut, straightforward, rational solutions, because I’m looking for the most effective strategy that can be implemented quickly in daily life without consuming too much mental battery. Come on guys, I need your help in this.
One thing I can say is when you look at her, try to think of her as being a human just like you, And what you think of her after seeing her should not be appalling (in the sense that if you go and tell her she should not be appalled). Does it satisfy your question?
Just think that u r not interested in attractive people. Then it will become habit.
Talking to them.
They’re normal people like us with ugliness and beauty within. If you find yourself thinking about other people sexually, it’s because you don’t know them enough. You’re only seeing the package without knowing what’s inside.
The best thing is to kill the doubt. I mean, what’s the point of imagining yourself having sex with this beautiful person if you’ll never have anything to do with her in the first place? If you feel attracted to her, try to get to know her or get rejected. If she’s a gf material or a hookup you will invest your time in real life instead of fantasizing about it (Because the sexual tension itself on a date is already rewarding), if not, you’ll find something in her which weakens your attraction. (Her personality usually).
The hack is to get out your head and to not waste time with delusions that don’t really exist or matter. (It also avoids oneitis and toxic platonic love)
But otherwise, there’s no magical solution. You cannot suppress the urge, because that’s how it’s supposed to be biologically, it’s natural. If our ancestors hadn’t had these same impulses which you’re currently having … we wouldn’t even be here to begin with. You cannot lie to your biology unless you artificially drop your testosterone levels to become assexual and depressive or spend your whole day meditating in a male-only buddhist temple.
I know the impulses are awful but don’t try to deny it. Instead, learn how to accept its disadvantage and advantages and deal with it. You can also train your brain to make quick decisions and get rid of thoughts that waste your time.
Like, why would you spend time thinking about Emma Wattson if you’re never gonna date her? Or why are you going to fantasize about that hot co-worker if you don’t even plan to talk to her? You gotta pick what’s tangible for you and who you’ll be willing to invest the precious time of your life into.
You can’t have sex with images after all.
I think the realisation that they have done nothing to earn it will help. Physical and sexual beauty is mostly genetic, and the person in question has done nothing that merits our infatuation or respect. It’s just like respecting a rich guy’s son.
The only difference between you and him is that he was born in an attractive/rich family.
@s8k8 1. In public, get one good look at someone and make it a point not to look again.
Remind yourself if you are doing nofap you aren’t ready for a relationship. (most women probably won’t support you in nofap).
Remember if you are happy with being single just taking a look is enough. You don’t want more.
if any of these don’t work for you, you probably want a companion.
Guys! All of your answers to my question are very insightful and useful. Nearly all of you are spot on and right about the things you mentioned. I’m very thankful to you all, because these answers make sense to me and now my mind will contemplate and surely, it’s going to be a little less difficult to deal with this situation. So thank you all again.