How are we supposed to change?

So how are we supposed to view women on nofap? :confused:
I mean when I used to fap I saw every women sexy, like even the ugliest ones where sexy in my vision
Now after 23 days nofap I see them all non attractive, like she needs to be suuuper hot to even catch my eye, is that normal?
I still can get an extreme orgasm to porn though

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They say, “Old habits die hard”, but they DO die. My opinion of women was also the same when I was fapping before. But now after day 41, I don’t see every women as some sex object. Now I have learned to admire them for there beauty. Even if someone is too damn hot, I try not to ogle by simply resisting myself to look. I have developed this habit of not looking women at there body parts. Trust nofap, in some time, however long it takes, you will change.

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I have two different feelings one is I am afraid I will completely lose attraction becasue I dont see women beautifull anymore and the second feeling relief because now I can focus without looking at them feels weird
Even my ex-girlfriend I see her super ugly now used to see her beautiful :confused:
@aapoorv75

This is because you are going through flatline. Don’t worry, you will feel all the attraction after day-30 or so. Just hold on.

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What you are going through can be compared to friendship. If you have friends for the sake of having friends and socializing, then it is a bad thing and they are not real friends. However, if your friends are truly important to you, you will see them less good but more beautiful in a way.

It is the same with women. Seeing women with lust will give nothing to you. But seeing them as human beings, complex and subtle, will allow you to find a new sort of beauty, which is way more enriching than the lustful way. It is simply another way of thinking.
It will require time to achieve this but if you continue NoFap, this will come naturally. You just have to keep going. We all know that there is a period of time where we see women without lust and without beauty, but this is only a transition time. In fact, you should even be happy of this because it means that you will soon see women in the better way.
Good luck man all you have to do is grind :fire::fire:
83d24b

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Odd because I think the opposite can be true. Porn can create such high standards of physical perfection that married men who are porn addicts find their wives less attractive until they quit porn and then old feelings of attraction come back. Likewise single guys such as myself can have unreasonably high standards of beauty because of porn and forget about other important aspects of a woman such as her personality and character. However if you are feeling lustful and desperate then any woman can look desirable but that isn’t a lasting attraction if you were intimate with or dating just any girl I think those feelings and desires would quickly fade and you’d be looking at every other girl as an unrecovered porn addict. Just my thoughts anyway.

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Of course your standards are higher because of porn. But this does not stop you from seeing women with lust, even if you find them unattractive. This is the porn paradox. Your brain desperately tries to find the type of women you see in porn in real life. But of course it can’t, because these girls aren’t even real. So it settles on other, seemingly less attractive women. As a result, you see only unattractive women around you but you can’t help but see them with lust, as if they were objects. That is what I meant by «lustful».
Then,when you quit porn, you can start seeing women with their real beauty and without this kind of lust, simply because your standards are getting normal again and all women seem more beautiful.
Anyway, this is just my way of thinking, but I think you misunderstood it.

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@pierretomas18
100% Couldnt explain that better!
Thank u

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