ERNOL's Journal ☀


It’s time I hold myself accountable and continuously evaluate myself. So, I have decided to write in a diary. Mainly to track my goals, progress and performance. Let’s see how it goes. Hoping for the best.
Anyone visiting my journal welcome to you! I usually don’t get much time so I don’t know if this will be an enjoyable read for you. But I do wanna take a jab at making my diary an interesting read for the readers. As I said time is a major constraint for me, one thing is certain i’m gonna be irregular at writing quality content haha :sweat_smile: peace!

Update from day 47: You will notice I talk about both my life struggle and also noPMO struggle here. The reason for that is psychological stress and emotional pressure are trigger for me.(I feel I am not addicted to PMO anymore so I don’t have problem with the normal occasional urges… well most of the time).

But mental stress and emotional pressure are trigger for me. It’s like a call to the dark side so to speak… And the way my life is right now there’s enough burden on me already. Anyway, enjoy your stay.

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Day 1
I didn’t have enough rest last night so i decided to take a nap in the afternoon. I saw a bad dream and it ruined my mood. I am wondering if i will get anything done today becuase of it…
But i try to take lesson from even bad experiences. The lesson i found from my bad dream would be there are toxic people in the world. Which is why we should appreciate the good people in our life.
And another thing is toxic people don’t want to leave you alone. They want to come back into your life. So constantly evaluate them and if they start becoming toxic again do not give them even an inch of breathing room to show toxicity. Ever! Maybe you are kind. I will respect you for that. but don’t let toxic people make your life a miserable place because of it. Toxic people will use your kindness as your weakness. kindness is a virtue. Don’t waste it on a person who is toxic on a constant basis. He does not recognize it’s value. Toxic person isn’t worth the price he will make you pay.

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Day 1
Made myself a big glass of juice and I’m good to go. Let’s see what i can get done!

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Day 1
Couldn’t do all the things i wanted to do today. Studied only little bit and read few pages of a book. Main reason is my sleeping schedule is all messed up. Only thing i’ve got going on for me is i did some exercise. So, probably it will be a good night’s sleep. I watched an interesting video on youtube though.
personal goals
0/7 studying/learning
1/7 exercise
0/7 read 2 books (read only 1 book)
0/7 learn new language

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I watched an interesting video today. It did make me think…
Here’s the video

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Self-reminder: don’t waste time on internet when in reality it doesn’t help you at all

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Day 2
Today was not a fruitful day in terms of achieving my objective. I slept like a baby today. I am also working on coming up with a schedule that’ll work. Other than that today was well.

weekly personal goals
1/7 studying/learning
2/7 exercise
1/7 read 2 books
0/7 learn new language

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Day 3

I woke up a little while ago. I wanted to sleep more but in the end decided not to. I am trying to figure out if i have laziness problem( since i wanted to sleep again so badly) or if i am just tired( i slept 5 hours). If anyone’s reading this, let me know how long do you sleep to not feel tired throughout the day? Anyway, time to start another day. Saw the quote in the forum post and it really resonated with me:

“Either you run the day, or the day runs you.”

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Day 3

Currently feeling frustrated for not being productive. I have to contain this issue of mine. Time to start working. I feel that will be sufficient to stop feeling this way.

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Same feeling, bro. My streak is only 10 days, but I feel not productive at all because of lack of willpower.
But there’s always some stuff to fo, I’ve got a huge project at work.
So let’s do it, now or never.

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I’m with you. Let’s give our best. Let’s go!

Feel free to let me know how was your performance, ok?

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Day 3
Did a few study sessions but then i fell into the trap of net browsing and continued procrastinating. I was about to ignore eating dinner and fall asleep but in the end i have decided to eat dinner. Because i should take care of myself.
weekly personal goals
1/7 studying/learning
2/6 exercise
1/7 read 2 books
0/7 learn new language

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Hey @ERNOL. It’s good you have ypur goals I salute you for that… I don’t wanna be negative or wanna stop you in what you want to achieve it.

You see buddy your putting to much stress on you for wanting to do to much at one time. It’s awesome to push yourself, but you just need to scale down a little bit, because you see your mind is the problem here, because it is trying to cope with the change you are bringing. It was used to fapping and web browsing and other activities. So it is not use to going at a crazy pace of nofapping, studing, reading, learning a new language and exercising in your schedule.

So your mind is going in exhaustion with all the new things it has to cope with. Also it is going into a decision exhaustion state because you constantly decide on should I read or not for example and in the end you don’t, because your brain is thinking of all the options you have rather than to read. I know I might sound bad and everything, but your not used to a schedule so throw it away and just like nike’s slogan is ‘just do it’. Just try to incorporate your new things in your day. Don’t force everything at once and that’s why your not getting productive.

The other thing is incorporate your things seperate with an easy goal. For example if you wanna read, read only one to 3 pages for a week. Or exercise like doing 10 push ups for a week. And so on it will cut down on procrastination because you’ll give your mind room to accommodate all the new things. Just start off easy so your mind can adapt also with the small achievable goal your setting and achieving it will motivate you more to do more.

So also your sleeping thing… like you I also was tired as damn, but there is no conclusive time in which they say is effective or enough because everybody is diffrent and some need less sleep then others but the general believe is 6 to 8 hours of sleep, but you can test that also by sleeping for in that time period for a week checking how you feel. Note and probably obvious listen to your body when your tired go and sleep don’t stop it just go to bed. The other thing you can try for a week is going to bed each day for 2 weeks at the exact same time as the day before and also waking up at the same time each day and notice how it is effecting you.

Also lastely on the tiredness issue check your diet. Check that what you eat truely suply your body with enough nutrients, vitamins, minerals, proteins and carbs. Use multivitamins and they are all differnt and don’t necessarily work for you from first try again a week or two’s test on this one. Follow the intake instructions so you don’t over supplement because that’s also not good… If your able consult a doctor or dietitian on this if your ever uncertain.

I hope it helps good luck man and stay strong!

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@Cubenix thanks for the feedback. I appreciate it. I just woke up. I will read it.

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Day 6
I am feeling kinda sick today so i am relaxing today.

I’d say @Cubenix got good points… not just for me but for everyone else. I will talk about the points later eventually as i get more time.
So, @Cubenix if you feel interested to hear my thoughts you are welcome to visit my journal anytime.

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Day 6
If i have to be honest i don’t like writing it here… but I have to be true to myself… I had a breakdown today due to frustration. My family member spoke to me and i have calm down in the end. I realized i have to stop being this hard on myself.

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Yes man, be kind to yourself. I used to have breakdowns out of frustration from school work and it was difficult, but I’ll tell you man, getting sleep makes managing these things and being productive so much easier! I used to get as much sleep as you, and I would always wake up tired, was depressed everyday, couldn’t focus on work, and was emotionally distraught.

Sleep is literally so important for your body I have found. Your brain releases all its toxins during sleep.

Personally, and I know I am on the upper spectrum and not normal with this, but I need around 9 hours of sleep every night. If you are waking up tired, your body is trying to tell you it needs more sleep. When I get enough sleep, I don’t wake up feeling like that, I feel good and ready to conquer the day.

They say the average adult needs 7-8 hours of sleep each night, and the teenager needs 8-9 or 9-10. As cubenix was saying, everyone’s different though, but you definitely should try getting more sleep than 5 hours. Try getting 7 hours of sleep and see how you feel. If you still feel tired, try 8. If you feel groggy like you got too much sleep, then try 6.

But I think you might find that you will feel a lot better in a lot of areas once you start getting more sleep consistently. It’s a huge player in mental health, at least in my life.

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Day 7
Today is beginning. Just had to share my thoughts. Today is the victory day of my country(Bangladesh).

Respect for the women and men that had to sacrifice their honour and their life in the war for the freedom of this country. I never can and never will know the sacrifices they had to make. They deserve peace. May they rest in peace.

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Yes, i used to sleep less and push myself harder. In the end, my life was a mess. I did not gain much. It was all over the place. I have to live healthy starting today.

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Day 9
Life’s been going slow. Still working on improving my eating and sleeping habit.

My NoFap journey is going well. I had minor urges a few times which was no problem. You know what they say:

“urges come, urges go.”

Today i was having my 1st dream in this streak and it could result in a wet dream but I did end up stopping myself in the middle of the dream. That feels good ha ha.

On today’s to do list:
Positive affirmation
Studying

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