Emotional damage

Hello everyone. I recently went through a terrible heartbreak. I was in a relationship with someone for about 4 years. It was from when I was around 21, I’m almost 25 now and I don’t even know where to start from. I thought it was going great. Everyday I wake up and the pain is … indescribable, really. I feel like talking to someone might help but at the same time I don’t feel like talking. Cos it means I have to think about it again. and it really hurts. I don’t consider myself addicted to porn (maybe I am, I don’t know). I’d say the average time in between my use of porn was usually about 2 months. And it mostly happened when I was feeling stressed. I may or may not be addicted, all I know is I don’t want pornography to be my “stress-relief” option. I don’t want it in the picture at all. Everyday I wake up and I can’t get myself to do the things I used to love to do because I keep thinking this person who I thought would always be there just stood up and left. I don’t like the person I’m becoming, and I’m scared to interact with people. Very scared. I’m scared of being hurt, I’m scared of trying again, I’m scared. I put a lot into the relationship and to see it blow up in my face is messing with my head.
I think today was better than the past few days. I was motivated to work out and I did some studying. I hope tomorrow would be better.

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That hurts man… I’m really sorry. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. It’s good to talk to people, even if it’s online at first. That’s a step in the recovery process. I don’t think you’re addicted yet, but be careful. You need to watch out for those moments when you want to watch porn. Be careful my friend. Anything you need let me know

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Thank you very much. I appreciate your kind words.

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I’m really sorry to hear this man, must be hard for you, but you’ve already started taking steps in the right direction! Keep improving and persevere and one day how you’re feeling now will be a distant memory. It sounds to me like you might be struggling with depression so I suggest seeking professional help.
If it’s not available to you for whatever reason you could try finding CBT apps/ books.
Good luck, avoid porn, build healthy habits and continue to work on building new relationships!

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Sorry to hear that bro. May God help you and heal your heart break.

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Thank you so much. It’s hard but I’ll get over it.

Thank you. I’ve been finding different ways to cope. If you have suggestions for the CBT books, I’ll gladly appreciate it.

I am 24, but never been in relationship at all so i cant fully feel how your feeling bro, but i am sure it hurts a lot. May you find strength to move on.

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Thank you. It’s been tough but I’ll keep trying to move forward.

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Keep going brother. Time heals everything and things will get better. Trust God in the process and know you are never alone, he is always next to you ready to help if you only ask.

I sort of went through the same thing recently and I know how painful it is and it seems like you can’t start again and find someone new to trust and be open with. With time you will heal and feel better and ready for a new relationship.

I truly believe everything we go through is for our own good and that it improves us which is why we need to go through it.

Much love brother. Stay strong :heart::heart:

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@memost thank you very much. I’m sorry about your similar experience. I’m glad we’re both accepting a new turn in our lives and all we can do is push forward!!!.

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I’m sorry to hear that. Addiction always starts somewhere… I don’t think you’re addicted yet, but I think you’re in serious danger. I think a lot of guys here will tell you that porn addiction feeds off of feelings of shame, despair, loneliness, self-doubt, etc. If you can keep yourself from using it, do. If you can’t, get help. We’re here for you.

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