It’s only Day 11 of my reboot and this energy inside of me is back and it’s more intense than ever!!! the most intense I’ve felt it in comparison to my previous Day 20s and I feel more alive inside, I feel this particular powerful energy a lot more prominent in my chest area, Monday never felt so great for me! just by my own feelings!
Last week for me was a complete flatline getting back on board to my target even on my Day 7, 8’s, 9’s and 10’s, my testosterone levels made me act like a complete ignorant person and at the same time I wasn’t living up to my usual duties at work and voluntary work, it felt like their wasn’t going to be a sign of a light at the end of the tunnel but today…what a fucking amazing game changer!!!
But here’s a problem! my urges are so fucking high today! I was at work on my internship job in the morning today, I was watching and keeping any eye on a tech run of a play we have in production.
So I’m just sitting down on my chair and Mr long Benny in my trousers began doing a game of sit ups and he wasn’t stopping.
It was was one of them moments when you know no one notices your dick goes mad hard but you still feel ultimately embarassed? lol well that’s how I felt, what made it worse was this head employee who I think likes me? and always says “Hi” to me and I think I genuinely having a liking for, walked in eating, sat down next to me and started talking to me about the stage set up my dick went mad rock solid, so solid I didn’t think I’d have a chance of moving from my seat for the rest of lunch time, I just played it cool leaned back on my seat and continued talking to her.
It was one of those moments where I wanted this girl to just GO!!! JUST so my dick can have a piece of mind and get back to sanity AT WORK!!!..in God’s name she left the building and told me “See you later” (Hopefully at a romantic place if I’m lucky ) anyways me and my dick was in a mental fight UNTIL…my head technician told me to do a duty and put a mic pack on charge…FUCK ME!!! WHY!!! I had no choice but to stand up and put my hands in my pockets.
Luckily for me he was a row above behind me people was there but it was a position where I can bend over, lean my leg to reach his radio Mic pack and turn around quick and not embarrass myself looking like a complete muppet, I did it! and surprisingly no one noticed as I ran to the closest pillar whilst talking to my head technician and then ran to the closest door!! Hallelujah!!!
No Fap is a huge benefit in terms of goals but the urges are deadly in social situations! yesterday my dick was as floppy as a rubber glove and today it was as solid as a vibranium rod and no matter what I try to do I can’t stop thinking about this girl at work that I always see, I think I like her she’s what you would call “average looking” but I think I like her but here’s a problem and I know I shouldn’t put my confidence beneath status but she’s got a big position at work she could be at least 4 or 6 years older than me by scratch I’m only 25…HELP ME!!! she’s another girl who’s recently been on my mind very strongly no matter what I do! or where I go she’s been on my mind! and for the first time in a while I’ve felt legitimate solid urges over an ACTUAL girl I think I like…HELP ME! I feel if I make a move I’ll just end up embarrassing myself I don’t even know if she’s taken??? lol but if she is it makes no sense why she’s randomly popped up in my head constantly
Remember my last post about how I explained the universe is on your side when you have a good strong faith and gives you choices well this is one of them! what do I do? I am a confident person but when it comes to the ladies I flop completely! and IT’S the first time I ever felt a public urge is a while too any advice guys?!