So after doing my No Fap reboot of 18 days after I quote on quote “Relapsed” by accidently watching porn and then watching it on purpose for a second time because we all know that’s a speculative “rule” on PMO in the No Fap community that if you watch porn you “relapse” and “edge” e t.c e.t.c, so anyways after I “relapsed” I decided to restart my counter because apart of me believed I was cheating myself but at the same time “starting again on Day 1” isn’t actually a Day 1 and I still thought I lost a lot of what I accomplished anyways in the process even though I believed it was for the best, so anyways last night I physically and purposely relapsed to porn once again to make sure I start my regime this time around to 100% disapline my self on PMO, since joining No Fap I got to my highest streak of 22 days I was doing so well in that streak in January then I failed it out of urge, then I began the recent reboot I did in the middle of February as I speak today this would’ve make Day 20 on that reboot but looks like I’m back to “square 1” or should I say “Sqaure 0” according to my counter, I had another out of control binge session last night before I went to bed to work and then one more after I woke up from my sleep just before I went to work now this isn’t sour grapes but after that relapse it gave me the most open wake up call ever that we are counting our days as to when we don’t fap just as we say we “loose our benefits everyone we relapse” and life is so short it’s like we are counting part of our life away whether or not we speak to people or do activities, hell even before PMO I still talked to people, performed on stage in theatres and went out to places e.t.c, now this isn’t sour grapes at all cause I relapsed I made the decision myself but just as when we relapse taking away part of ourselves away I feel if we even look at our counter it’s detrimental to our mindset of “when and where we reach our potential” when we are actually doing it now, because life is funny we can die from anything or someone tomorrow and “not receive those benefits” I’m not making a rule book on the NO Fap community I’m just talking my experiences on how we can perceive things a bit differently because I never used to masturbate at all as a teenager, only after my first relationship at 23 things began to go “downhill” for the past two years so I want to get back the same “not counting mindset” I had as a teenager so this is why I say fuck counting the days, I mean we all work differently the way we fight off our urges and temptatons I’m just showing and explaining an important alternative to this…well back to Day 0 again 100 days here I come lol.
Kudos to you for sticking to it. We’re all in the same boat, one way or another. I just had a really strong urge but decided to come here and post instead of giving in. 6 days and counting, but I agree not to be too obsessed with the counter. Former smoker too, I don’t even look at the counter anymore (it’s been over 4 years!)
i think it is important to realize the this isn’t a progress counter but a streak counter. it’s just a tool to help progressing. you can have a 90 days counter but you are still on level 0 or having a 0 day counter but being at level 10.
if this tool helps -> use it
else -> don’t
I used to get triggered by the counter too, it’s like it added even more pressure to an already stressful situation. But that was when I was going Hardmode, now that I allow myself to masterbate I actually love my counter cause I see my goal of quitting porn as accomplishable, whereas quitting MO without a girlfriend seemed like climbing mount Everest. I never had a problem with chronic masterbation tho, it was the extremeness of the porn I was watching that is my problem. I only mo every second or third day and that’s without even Instagram or other social media, when I have porn under control I might try to get that to once a week. Mo imo isn’t anywhere near as bad porn but it is still a form of escapism, like YouTube and social media, which I don’t like but its absurd to think someone could quit all these things at once and porn after a decade of addiction. What works for me might not work for other people but this is my two cents.