First, i apologize for my bad english. Second, i’m new in here and i want to share my story to begin this journey. Here i go
My first introduction to porn (and fap) was 8 years ago when i still in my final year of middle school. This then became addiction a year later when i reach highschool and it grow even worse every years. I reach the point where i fap 2 times or more a day (my longest strike is 7 times a day). Not just my intensity is increasing, my fetish grow weirder and weirder and finally i begin to can’t fap without watching some intense porns.
Next, in my college years, this addiction started to affect my life. I must bust a nut or two so that i can fall asleep every night or when i feel stressed with my life. Then i tried to throw myself in every possible activities in my college. It work but still not very effective when i alone in my room for a long time.
And finally, because this pandemic and social distancing, i can’t go away from my room and i can’t stop myself from pleasuring myself. My fetishes become weirder and werider to the point i start to hate myself because i like it. My productivity drop drastically and this become a fuel to my self-hate. Last night, my frustation reached its peak and i began to change myself. I deleted all my porn-related data in my homestation, smartphone, and clouds. I try to remember every accounts i made in some adult-websites and delete it. I think play store know my addiction and recommend this app for me. Immediately i install this app and love the concept.
For now my goals is 1 month and to cope this journey, my plan is to learn another programming languanges and do some exercises for my body. My biggest obstacle i think is my hobby to read mangas (you know mangas right now full of that thing). I hope it didnt affect my goals and i hope i can life without porn for a solid year or the years later.
Sorry for my long rant because i dont know where i must share this (i ashamed to share this with my family and i dont know if any of my friends share the same goals with). Finally, wish me luck!