I want to make a confession today. I am feeling like I am a culprit, felling pathetic because i had done some sins. Today i am going to make confession about one of them.
Right now I am in a relationship, which was started in March 2015. From myside… it was started with just liking and a time pass which turned into love and a serious… honest relationship.
From herside… she says she loved me from day one.
From 2015 march to 2016 october… we go out enjoy… do romance in dark of movie halls… she said that she does not know anything about masturabtion and porn videos… and she never masturbated before( firstly i dont trust her ) but after some time i observed some activities of her…and I partially believed that she really dont know about it… and sequence of my pathetic actions began here.
I introduced her with porn video(but she did not enjoyed it and found it disgusting) … and masturbation.
Around in september 2016… i took her to my friend’s flat and tried sex (with her consent) but as she was virgin and cannot bear that pain so i did not do it but i masturbated her first time there.
In november 2016, my devil mind …that demon inside me…on phone call i insist her and make her to do masturbate herself and we did what called a phone sex. From then we do this phone sex per week on an average.
Now well she is not that much addicted and also enjoy it( as we all did in initial days) but now as i am aware of it…why i failed everytime in my life just becoz of average efforts which i put due to this masturbation and that dopamine and other harmone imbalance. So i want to make her free from this… which i have started.
Because when she will realise the bad effects of it and find herself trapped in this addiction and cannot go out from it that easily…then she will curse me only becoz i am that culprit who took her into this. (As i want to curse that guy who taught me this).
So I want to make her free from this thing which i had started in her life. I want to make free myself too.