Bad sexual performance. I need help

Good morning guys.

I had sex with a woman who wish me well and who I have been together with for a few weeks.
After 10 days of total abstinence even in thoughts, I thought I was a lion in bed, far from it.
It hardened with difficulty and I had a very bad performance.
After trying for more than an hour, I didn’t come, She is also a beautiful woman. When I fap I take a few minutes but in the moment of a real sexual intercourse, I failed.
Guys I don’t know why the hell this.
She thought I had recently fapped but instead I kept telling her that I had been abstinent for 10 days, I would have been happier if she was right. I didn’t come during intercourse, I’m glad I kept my record, but that’s a bitter consolation. Who helps me understand?

This thing obviously motivates me strongly to stop fapping.


What do you expect from a 10 days abstinence, a mount Everest?!
The journey takes time and patience as well.


My theory is that this was all because of the “lonely habitat” habit.
Is this the right theory?

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Dude take a chill pill, it happens when you have sex with someone for the first time…i am sure it was your anxiety playing out.


Then if I use a condom even worse but I want to use the condom and at the same time please her.

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Porn literally ruined our minds of sexual functioning I guess Allahu Alam
So when we don’t know how to please a girl

Mate you can please her but you are abstaining so not telling you might be the correct thing. Abstain for a longer duration, when you feel that your drill machine is strong enough to drill holes then you can try.

The point is that she asks me, she insists and I get very anxious.

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I agree with what the guy said about anxiety…

U worry alot about pleasuring her,
What about your own pleasure, worry about that.


Then there is also the fear of having her conceive, because the erogenous intercourse is not enough, she wants to be fucked.

It’s a edge of a cliff situation in my view, you can make her understand her to wait for sometime, if she understands you then it is good otherwise she just only wants from you sexual favours that’s it.

Then I’ll do what’s right, I’ll ask her to wait.
The point is that she is 41 and I am 30 and she would like to have a child in the future, only since she is of a certain age and she knows she will remain sterile at any moment, she is afraid to wait too long.

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