🔥 Ash_Matt's self-improvement diary

Diary
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I mean, it’s NNN. So might as well post an update.

→ Nofap ←
On day 10 right now.
Feeling good, but never letting my guard down.
I have relatively high testosterone as compared to avg people so when I am around day 7 the urges get really high.
The only reason I’m continuing and persevering is because of God’s strength ALONE.
He fights the battles for me while I rely on Him and follow Him.

→ Med School ←
Really busy, final exams coming up in Jan.
Did better in last exams by God’s grace, studying well. Being part of the Student Council and all the extra duties involved in that was tiring but a fun experience.
Also I am in the editorial team for our magazine, busy with working on that as well.
Loving med school, it’s been an amazing almost-two years, learnt a lot but I know it’s nothing compared to how much I will have to learn in the future.
Juniors are juniors :laughing: fun to see they scuttle around, especially the first years; some of the younger girls also hit on a couple of us guys that was funny lol

Also doing some digital artwork commissions, that’s always fun

→ Basketball ←
Well our team won the Zonals Trophy, we came first, so then after that of course was Interzonal tournament.
That place was pretty far (16 hours) away and the bus ride was one heck of an experience.
But it was worth it.
We won the State Interzonals Tournament.
We are the best Medical College Team in State :smiling_imp:
Scored some clutch baskets in the Interzonals Finals by God’s grace too…feeling like '96 Bulls

→ Might post a fitness update some time if I get the time

→ Only region I am unsatisfied about my progress is side hustles; not getting much time to invest in them so the process is going very slow; must work on that

→ But proud of what I achieved and the person I’ve become; I know I’ve come far but I know I’ve got a lot further to go, especially regarding nofap
But God has healed me and will help me because He is good.

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Lesgo brotha you be slayin in 'em hoops
And congratulations

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thanks my man!

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friggin hell bruhhhhhh, this guy livin his life :joy::fire:.
I also should write an update soon.

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look forward to it :fire::fire:

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Day 14

Two weeks have passed by God’s grace.
I still have urges fairly often, and a few sexual dreams, which I am working on by reducing lustful thoughts that cross my mind.
God is the one who helps me, He has saved and healed me. He has freed me.

Going back to the gym tomorrow (I skipped going yesterday as I had another exam).

My University Exams are coming soon…need to focus more.
Two years of med school just flew past :cry: It feels like yesterday I joined this place.

Going to tidy up my room and do some chores first, then probably study a bit before sleeping (hopefully by 10 pm so I can get up on time for the gym)

That’s all for now I guess,
Peace out,
Flame on :fire:

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Bro your life is like a movie :movie_camera: :popcorn:

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Thanks very much for the comment! Appreciate it :blush:

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Nothing that great, it will probably be a rant only :joy:

Brug even I feel like you cleared neet just yesterday lol.

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yeah y’all were with me in my whole preperation and grinding phase :saluting_face: can’t ever forget that…those were the best times
(I will still randomly tag @Kaizen … who knowns, maybe one day he will come back stronger :laughing: )

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Lol :joy::joy: he disappeared and never came back.

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:sunny: Day 22 :sunny:

Writing this first thing in the morning.

→ NOFAP ←
Going strong by God’s grace.
Avoiding even the smallest peaks by reminding myself that that is lust. And with God’s help I will defeat that. Because He has given me victory over ■■■■.

Matthew 5 :
everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye makes you stumble and leads you to sin, tear it out and throw it away, that is, remove yourself from the source of temptation; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell

It is pretty intense though. Getting urges very often so I am fighting to stay pure for my future wife.

→ DISCIPLINE ←
Another thing I wanted to address. I think a big reason I am getting urges is relative lack of discipline. Especially because I got a new phone, I like to mess around with the features in that. So I will do the following now to improve further:

  1. delete Insta and keep it that way till exams are done
  2. go to the gym in the mornings around 5:30 not 6
  3. no binging social media unless I complete my allocated work

Need to work harder and finish my goals so I can do well in the upcoming exams with God’s help.

→ ALSO ←
Something I am a little proud of is going out of my comfort zone yesterday, Because as an introvert I run out of social energy by the end of the day and just want to be left alone. I was feeling that way yesterday as well, when my Church friends called me to hang out and have dinner at their apartment. I really didn’t feel like going, but forced myself to go because I felt if I stayed in the room, I would relapse, and also to develop a better bond with them. I’m glad I forced myself out of the comfort zone for little things like this (seems more effortful for me) so that I can continue this mindset.

bAU

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:sunny: Day 25 :sunny:

Been too long and I have been undisciplined.
New rules apply from tomorrow to take back control.

  1. No Instagram shorts (except saved reels for motivation) which I can see on the laptop (deleted the app on phone)
  2. No YouTube shorts
  3. No watching any form of social media before 12 pm
  4. Complete at least 50% flashcards for all 3 subjects
  5. Complete research details

Goals 5 and 6 are specific for tomorrow; rest I wish to practise going forward till my exams are done at least.

“I can do all things through CHRIST who gives me strength”

:latin_cross:

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Let’s goo further beyond! :fire::fire::fire::fire:

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:sunny: Day 30 :sunny:

I still have several aspect of my discipline which I have to improve, but by God’s grace I am continuing the race and working hard.
First exam done yesterday, went fairly well. Next one is tomorrow so I have to study today.

More sexual drive is present, but I definitely do not want to waste it fapping to pixels on a screen. Rather, there are so many girls around who want to talk to me and who I find it fun to talk to. Not in a sexual way, but just as friends, especially when I get bored. Talking to real people and real girls is much better than ■■■■.

My discipline is slowly improving, I am hoping that after exams once I get more free and re-start the gym it will further improve.

I just keep praying to God and saying his name when temptations arise. If I’m alone and tempted very hard, as soon as I say “CHRIST help me,” all the temptations disappear.

I would highly recommend watching this, especially if you are a Christian. Even if you are not, it is a beautiful video on what it is to be a Biblical Man:

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Finally a worthy opponent, our battle will be legendary!!

Congrats bro and remember, this is just a warm up for your true potential :sunglasses:

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:sunny: DAY 35 :sunny:

Not going to post a lot today, was a day I regret a lot of.
I wasted too much time because I was reading stories and didn’t study enough today.
I will try to make up and cover some decent topics today, before I sleep.
While stories themselves are not bad, once I start one I tend to keep reading till I come to the end of the story because I can’t wait to find out what happens. I’m a voracious reader so today pretty much the whole day was just doing that.
It’s not bad in itself, but I have a lot of other things to do, especially studies-wise.
Usually during exams since I can’t go out as much I tend to turn to reading, but today’s was too much. I cannot waste time like this anymore.

Todays’ resolutions:

  1. From today on, no more using phone till I complete my Quit Time with God
  2. No reading stories until 8 pm until I start working on my first, and write at least 3 lines of it
  3. No reading for leisure till I’ve completed the topics I’ve decided to study for the day

Discipline is slowly improving, but every time I’m on the right track, Satan throws another obstacle at me. But that is how he is. And I will continue to rely on CHRIST and win.

That’s all for now I guess,
Peace out
Flame on :fire:

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:sunny: day 40 :sunny:

As corny as it sounds, I actually had a dream last night that I relapsed and lost NNN on the last day :skull: I woke up and was glad it was a dream.

Discipline is slowly improving, but not as fast as I liked; the fact that I couldn’t go to the gym the past two weeks due to exams hasn’t helped either; when I go to the gym its a lot easier to stay disciplined the rest of the day;

Urges as still there on occasion, but with God’s help I am over them.
Jesus has showed me the light and freed me from this addiction.

Let’s keep going

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That ain’t a dream …
THATS A NIGHTMARE :skull::skull::skull::skull::skull::skull::skull:

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