A Daydreamer's Diary

I have been an addict for years. When I hear about other people’s addiction in real life, I can relate to them. It does not matter whether they have sex-, alcohol-, or how many addictions exist in today’s liberal society as long as I do not overstep through addiction stages. In example, a Diagnosis written by medical director Harry Croft (https://bit.ly/2kzMlUy), there are 4 stages of pornography addiction and two of them are in my opinion basically influenced by the devil himself. THAT IS INSANE! No wonder why the lefty liberal media almost never trace back rape and pedophilia to extreme pornography. They all believe it’s all about “rape culture”, specially feminists, while actual perverts of mega-corporations who produce porn are actually swimming in a big pile of cash. These producers do not care about a woman’s feelings. It’s all about satisfying the man until he ejaculates in three consecutive days during photo shooting. It’s also all about treating a woman like a slave tied with ropes in the basement or an object on a kitchen counter which you could just “yank” on without consequence. No one cares about what she feels in this industry. Because when she has gone through introductions about what her role is, she will not discover about the dark side of porn industry at her early days, until she chooses to stay and earn money from voyeurism, or leave and search meaning for her life.

I am Wise_Guy_97 (wish I could change that).
Sharing code: 35dc91
Current streak: 1 day
Highest streak: 40 days
Age: 22
Sex: Male
Location: Norway

I sometimes find myself in situation where I am having an urge in the morning, afternoon, evening and somehow all my determination and will to keep on going with NoFap fades away. I would cheat myself into peeking, feel ant-like sensations in my brain and relapse. I have tried many times and made good progress but when the big urges come, I am numb and behave paralyzed. Trying to escape an addiction that has inhabited my body for years without realizing I had it in the first place. My first Objective is to go past day 21-24, because between those days I would experience this mega-urge in the morning when I’m on the bed. Hence this diary will remind me to post my reasons for quitting PMO-addiction and hopefully I will break free.

4 Likes

DAY 0

Lust of searching a pornstars name on google made me search for her pictures numerous times on the internet. Luckily I the search filter is strict and I could slowly control my urges. Until I get the idea of finding a comment I have written on a reddit post about about NoFap many months ago. However, I get lust of searching porn on reddit where obviously the NSFW filter does not work correctly (in that case many posts are not filtered). As the day continues I arrive at my dorm in the evening and try to straighten myself. Discipline myself. But since I know myself, I had to masturbate to porn or otherwise I would look at it again and lose my confidence. If I continued to consume porn, the next day would I behave perversely. So I had to commit this masturbation act in order to hopefully quit this addiction once again. I have so many reasons to quit binge-watch porn, masturbate and stop pleasuring myself. I would post daily my intentions for why I must and want to quit this addiction that I believe is a disease.

Reason 1: I want to stop looking for lust of a females body at moving pixels. Instead of that start a conversation with that blonde girl I made flirtatious eye contact with several days ago.

1 Like

I like your name, it could just be a parody, but it could also be true :+1::wink:
Perhaps both, given this journey we’ve all decided to embark upon :wink::pray:

I don’t have a problem with feminism per se,
But I do have a problem with people saying we shouldn’t objectify women, but porn is okay because “it’s their choice” - the truth is, it’s most likely not their choice, but the choice of ‘the moment’

DAY 0

I have relapsed again after the stupid thought “How about a little peek”. The second time I have ejaculated, I now have experienced premature ejaculation and have endured in less than 2 minutes. 2 MINUTES!? It is pretty obvious that porn and masturbation cause PE but I did not know the impact before I experience it myself.

Reason 2: I need to recover from PMO and premature ejaculation.

1 Like

DAY 9:

Before I enjoyed watching women take it in the a** during my PMO days. Now I believe it’s disgusting! When I am barely awake in my bed I fantasize about some women I’ve met, but it does not take me too long until I realize how boring it is before I finally stand up to wash my face. When I think about the recent a**l porn videos I watched a week ago, several questions come up to my mind and I would ask myself: Why would they do that? It so disgraceful. Doesn’t that guy get shit on his d*ck during set? Doesn’t that woman get infections when the guy switches from anal to vaginal penetration back and forth? Don’t they both get infections? Why would one HE be satisfied while SHE is hurting? Isn’t the purpose of this body part to defecate than to be penetrated? (Unless it’s medicine against fever, etc). While there other ways to satisfy one and each other, why succumb to the devil’s way of doing things?
My theory is because there is a relative demand from viewers who want to watch that kind of pornographic category which include different settings and which actresses should act.
What I want to get out of my system is the thought about this actress with a tanned body when she fakes hes orgasm while having her number 2 destroyed. I hate that so much, because it is disgusting and makes me want to puke.