36 year old with a 20+ year addiction

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Sharing code - ed649aa *

Current streak - 9 days *
Highest streak - 18 days *
Age - 36
Gender - M
Location - SA

Why I want a companion - Hi peeps, I’ve been struggling with this addiction for over 20 years and I’ve never told a soul. I’m married with kids and not even my wife knows. I would like to get a mature companion who’ve had a little more success than I’ve had.



41 year old here. Addicted like since 13.
My code: f95de6

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Hi great stuff woodchuck will add you asap

Hey there I’m 27 been addicted for close to 13 years. I recently started seeking help with my addiction because it almost cost me my marriage. More than willing to talk if you would like.

My sharing code is 6d7a18

Hey Mate, i know it’s tough to break away from this shit. I am 31 and I have been addicted to this shit for the last 18 years…
It haunts me to think about the my future if this demon never leaves for another decade…if I never act upon it soon i might end up becoming a nervous wreck…
This habit has already taken the best part of my youth…I sometimes wonder how diffrent things would have been if I would have never come across this habit…the choices that I have made in the past has a bearing on my present…i have sacrificed the many good things that life gave me to the altar of this demon…and all that I have received in return is sadness, guilt, loneliness and despair…i curse the day I when I discovered this shitty thing…I know I was made to be successful but I have miserably failed…
But I have learnt a lot of lessons as I have walked this terrible path…I believe that the best of me is still yet to come…someday I will break free…
Don’t lose hopes…God save us!


I just relapsed after a 10 day streak, just ended up edging for the past 2 days and I haven’t even ejaculated yet. Maybe I’ll just retain my semen so I can uphold my dignity, I know that sounds crazy, but if I ejaculated I go into this wormhole of sorrow, despair and regret. Yeah you’re we always wonder what could have been even we just said no to that first time. But we have addictive personalities so it was bound to happen knowing the crazy lustfilled society and environment we were born in to. Our generation faces the worst challenges. But thinking of the ‘what ifs’ and ‘could haves’ is not going to do us any good. We have to make today a day that will benefit us tomorrow. That fact that we’re here means we’re reaching out. Deep down we are good people. I know of people who don’t have our addictions but they’re worst pricks than we are. Don’t put yourself down. We all deserve freedom, because you’re working so had at it means that when you get it you’ll appreciate it more. We will get there!


I am on it mate…we don’t deserve this shit…we are made for better…and we won’t let PMO take the best of our lives…nor can PMO take the best of us from our families…our families deserve the better part of us…let’s do it for them…

You can watch my back @ code b1b29f

P.s. sometimes my status can be annoying… especially post-relapse…

Hey mate…i understand how difficult it might be to deal with it…I am an addict for last 18 years…let’s fight it out together…

My code b1b29f

Yeh me to, been on this shit for longer than I can remember. Married and have 2 kids. I can’t go on like this anymore the impulsivity is becoming stronger and stronger. It’s like I have a double personality. God-fearing and pious on the outside, but alone in the dark with uncapped internet and a mobile device I became a monster who does nothing but serve his lowly desires. You from UK?

Hi, Hows things going? You on top? I go without PMO for 10 days and think I’m a freaking Pope. Next thing I know I’m jacking off in the dark of my living room. Like I loose complete control of myself. It’s the same thing over and over, you know you going to feel shit afterwards yet you still do it.

What kinda help you been seeking exactly?

I added you mate. We will all beat this addiction together

Things are going pretty well, I’m over 60 days no porn no fap. My wife , friends, and family have been a great in supporting me as well as keeping me in check. When you relapse what typically leads to your relapse? As far as help I have been looking into sex addiction groups, thinking I’m going to join a living waters group in October when they start up. I’m also reading some books like false intimacy and men’s secret wars. And I’m looking into getting a psychiatrist.

That’s good you’re really taking it seriously. I would too but my family doesn’t know. I’m not in the position to tell them. It’ll Just make things worst for me. So I just suffer in silence. Normally things in video clips from YouTube and Facebook triggers me, I deleted those, then there’s movies and TV series, a bit difficult to give that up, but I think I should. Also being alone and late nights.

I understand how you feel about talking to your family but at the end of the day if you don’t tell them you’re letting fear and guilt take control of your life. I understand that it’s hard but being honest is the only thing that can shine light in your darkness and help you to start getting better. Not to mention family is a great help in the fight against this because they’re always around you and they know you best. In the end the decision is yours and yours alone. As far as triggers go you have to get rid of everything that can lead to triggers. If you get triggered by ads on YouTube then stop watching, if a TV show or movie gets you going then avoid that TV show. In the end you’re only going to get out what you put in so you have to decide for yourself if you want to get better or wollow in the pity of tour current status.

It’s nice to hear Meezmeister you are still with your family and kids. I have divorced lately and there is no way it wasn’t related to our addiction. Keep strong as you have great reason to fight!

Sorry to hear that man, what an eye opener that must be. I will continue to fight this battle for the sake of my family and my own sanity.

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