[26M] The_integrous_one's diary

Then close the phone now and get a good quality sleep. Don’t let any source of light in your room.

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19.03.2024
Finally here to post :sweat_smile:, feeling somewhat well. Did proper workout today, 3.5 kms run, legs and core workout, meditated for 10 minutes, I feel I really need to incorporate this habit because I am feeling a lack of presence of mind, less sleep is obviously one reason for this but regular meditation will definitely help.
Morning short prayer done, also read bhagavad Gita today for 5-10 minutes.
Plus I can easily get 7 or 7+ hours sleep now, kinda on time/earlier than usual bed timing here.
Ok off to sleep.

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20.03.2024.
Gym done, cardio (2.65 km run) and push day, meditation done, long prayer done, morning short prayer/meditation done, reading bhagawad gita done.
It’s almost 12 am, sleepy af, will directly go to bed after this, and thankfully tomorrow is the last day of this shift.

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21.03.24
Workout done (2.25 kms run, pull day), morning short prayer done, meditation and Gita reading done. Late to sleep but I am free now for 14 days. Will reach land tomorrow and home day after tomorrow morning.

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22.03.24
Gym done, Got compliments from a few friends that I look better and thinner even though my weight is same :rofl:, but I actually have gained some muscle lately so that might be the reason.
Already excited to play basketball after reaching home :joy:. But I gotta keep in mind to be productive and do work related studies, I am actually looking forward to that as well.
At the airport right now, will be reaching home by 12 pm or so tomorrow.

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23.03.24
It’s actually 24 now, but this post is for 23rd so here goes.
I reached home around 12:30 noon, had lunch with grandma, talked to a friend, decided that I’ll sleep for 1.5 hours and then go to play, but I ended up sleeping for 5 hours straight :skull:, because of overnight travelling probably. Felt quite sad that I missed playing :sweat_smile:. It was 7 pm already, Decided that I should workout but didn’t get enough time for that, had dinner with family, watched movie ZNMD but only half of it, will be watching the 2nd half tomorrow, then I came to room thinking I’ll watch some other movie because I’ve already slept in evening but I fell asleep, it was around 12, and my sleep broke off somehwere around 2, my friend was also awake for some reason, we chatted for a little while, and now it’s almost 4 am :skull:. I was feeling a little anxious about what I’ve been doing so came here to post to channelise my thoughts and make tomorrow count.
It’s actually Holi festival here tomorrow, won’t be celebrating too much because don’t have many friends here whom to celebrate with, so food will be the main source of celebration :joy::joy:.
I’ll keep an alarm for 6 hours from now, if I wake up earlier it’s fine, if I don’t, then I’ll wake up by the alarm. Plan is to freshen up, have dry fruits and workout, have protein afterwards, no proper breakfast, just brunch around 1 pm. Will be keeping my phone on detox till noon.
Hoping to be able to go to play tomorrow if time allows. Still regret missing playing because quite a few friends were coming to play :sweat_smile:, but I guess my body needed rest that’s why what happened happened. Anyway I should sleep now and hopefully I don’t mess with sleep now onwards.

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Forgot to post yesterday because I fell asleep all of a sudden, so herr’s yesterday’s update.
Worked out with dumbbells in the morning.
Went to play basketball, had nice games. Missed some shots in the first game because it has been quite a long time since I played but did well in the rest.
My back has been hurting a little bit again, idk why, but it’s not that bad.
Rest of the day celebrated Holi a little bit, had some traditional food. Completed the movie Zindagi na milegi dobara, everyone liked it.
Didn’t study at all (I had planned to invest one hour in studies).
For now it is 10:10 am, yesterday I had my phone on detox when I woke up, so immediately went for workout etc. Today didn’t do that, so I’ve done nothing till now.
Will put my phone on detox now for 2 hours, will be working out, praying and meditating in this period.
Also gotta find some good movie to watch with family in the afternoon.
About studying, well I can only find time for it if I wake up on time and keep my phone on detox in the morning, let’s see I might find some time before lunch. But I need to arrange clothes in my wardrobe first, and make a plan to execute daily tasks, don’t wanna be unproductive in this off period because that affects my work period.

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28/03/2024 Day 23
Did well today, morning workout, prayer, meditation, Gita reading, a little bit of cleaning, playing.
I need sleep so going to sleep on time.

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02/04/2024 12:13 pm

Hi, haven’t posted here in a few days, was making plans and all somewhere else but thought of posting here today, only two days of holidays left i.e today and tomorrow, actually day after is also a holiday but it’ll mostly go in travelling only.
Had some really nice days in this off period, yesterday we were travelling whole day, went go visit my sister in her college.
Today I was tired so after waking up in the morning I again went to sleep.
Anyway since I only have a limited time left at home now and I still have a lot to do. The plan I made for doing work related studies at home, well I have done nothing till now, I’ll have to conver that all up in today and tomorrow only. Plus for some reason I didn’t even learn anything new in guitar, did learn to play minor chords but my tutur got busy and all, haven’t even showed him that, wanted to have a class today but no reply from him so will have to have a class tomorrow and I probably won’t get time to practive whatever he teaches in it because I’ll be leaving on Thursday. But I’ll try keeping the class in the evening so I get all the important things done.
Plus I also have to go to a fair either today or tomorrow evening. Not sure. It’ll be better to go there as well tomorrow only after getting some things done but it might clash with the class. Anyway,

Tasks for today, just bought ms office subscription, it apparently requires subscription in mac now a days, will probably cancel it after free trial ends. Just did that because I need to pratice word and excel, out of touch, and they are of use in our work. Will do that today itself, I have two YT videos for that, both comprise of 1.5 hours but overall it might take some more time making notes etc.
Plus room cleaning is still pending :person_facepalming:, I’ve reached heights of procrastination in this task. Want to do it right now but I’ve to workout and have lunch before this.

So after going from here:

  1. Workout.
  2. Clean room (will take atleast 1 dedicated hour)
  3. Prayer and meditation.
  4. Practice word and excel. (excel is more imp)
    If I do this I won’t get time to go to fair, because let’s say this takes 3 hours so it’ll be atleast 6 or 7 by the time I finish :joy:. So sorted no fair today, I’ll have guitar class after 7 if the tutor responds else I’ll study some more time.
  5. Will do some reading and studying at night as well before sleeping (this one also depends on above point), will sleep by 12 and post here right before that, how much I did,.will also plan for tomorrow at that time according to the number of tasks I completed today.

(This post took more than half an hour because I went to buy that ms subscription in between)

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Only first three tasks completed. I took a nap after lunch again, felt kinda depressed in the evening for no reason at all, I started cleaning the room but I wasn’t feeling motivated so I called a friend, it lightened my mood and I became quite motivated afterwards, played music all along and as I thought cleaning and setting up my room will take about one hour but it took me about 4-5 hours :sweat_smile:. Wasn’t able to do anything else. Word and excel I might need to ignore lol, because I have one more important task and that is to rearrange my work related notes in another notebook, will do this in the morning after waking up, I’ll also get some at home cardio done in morning workout tomorrow. Will be going to a fair in the evening, will revise ms office only if time permits.
Action line for tomorrow morning will be, wake up, freshen up, workout, rearrange notes as fast as possible, then ms office revision only if time permits.
Will do nothing after 4 pm as will be leaving to enjot the fair along with my parents. Will probably finish the remaining packing tomorrow night or day after tomorrow morning before leaving.
Goodnight for now.

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Day 51 (No ■■■■ and or masturbation)

I haven’t posted in a while here because I’ve been living in a trance like state lately :joy:. Even the work period was enjoyable, probably because the constant “friend” who I had been talking to for so long has kinda turned into girlfriend :sweat_smile: and hopefully it’s gonna get more serious only, neither of us is into time pass type of relationships.
Now there’s extra motivation to do anything,.I’ve been fairly consistent with working out (she pushes me to go to gym), didn’t get much time in job period though because of calls and all but was still consistent, Also yesterday I did 2 hours gym and still feeling fresh today, planning to do the same today.
I also went out in the evening with a school time friend, we enjoyed, had good talks.
Later I also cooked food for dinner after quite a long time.
I haven’t expressed gratitude or Thanked God properly in some time so here I am taking time for it.So so grateful to God for putting me in the state where I am today, there used to be a time when I strived and probably sometimes was even desperate to have things that I have today. Deeply thankful to this community as well for making me grow and I am still growing, there are still aspects in which I have to work and grow more, learning and growing is ofcourse constant but here’s to small small wins and good life :clinking_glasses:.

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Brooooooo :grinning::fire::heart::pray:

Awesome post man :sunglasses:

Always be thankful, you have a lot of things going well for you in your life which others would be envious of.

Keep going brother, keep growing. :muscle::boom::100:

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Friendzone is afraid of bro.

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I love how this post have the wholesome element😄

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Whatever happening in your life rn is all because of your efforts and God’s grace. What we did was make you realise your inner capability.

Well, I think here “we” is people who have been in contact with you in your nascent days here. When I came in contact with you, you already had cracked a national level exam so I don’t think I have provided anything to your life but instead I took a loan from you because of my stupidity.

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:relieved::pray:

God’s grace man, God’s grace :heart:.

Thanks dude.

:joy::joy:

haha :sweat_smile::pray:.

hmmm yeah, the point I wanted to make is that I might not have been where I am now if I hadn’t found this forum and I am thankful for it.

arre no issues dude. It’s fine. You are an important part of this forum now, don’t devalue yourself.

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I didn’t meant in that manner maybe I went with the flow and didn’t thought what I was writing.

Now that some considerable amount of time has passed I see what I did, tho I have forgiven myself and that’s what led me to get on track. Tbh confessing what I did was the hardest thing but I can do it only because the trust I have in people of this forum.

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I can understand.

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Well I see in no time you grew old from 24 to 26. Because the dairy title had different age last time I saw it.

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@The_integrous_one
I am so happy for you man
Hope you have a permanent good life

I have a question for
Since you were relapsing every 5 or 7 days for a while

What would you do to get out of this repeated relapse loop cause i am stuck in it rn :joy:?

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