[22 M] Jose's diary

Life after a hundred.

I used to have anxiety and everything just seemed a messy, right now I’m going through it again and I intend to share this journey daily, maybe weekly. It’s been a long time since I’m trying to quit, I hope it might help me to keep clam and to stand firm with my purpose. Peace and may Christ bless you all!


When I say, My bed shall comfort me, my couch shall ease my complaint; Then thou scarest me with dreams, and terrifiest me through visions: Job 7:13‭-‬14 KJV

I woke up this way…

Times ago dreams used to express something that was about to happen and it was a true gift from God to those who follow Him. How far we distance ourselves from it and live like never at peace in fact. I don’t hope it makes sense, I don’t know what is to make sense sometimes. I’m exhausted, and this is not just about the fight against PMO, it’s beyond a lot of things. Maybe it’s because things should be this way, I have a lot of things to be grateful but life is hard yet. Yes, things should be this way…

Being busy really helps me to deal with it better, but feeling extremely tired should be avoided in my case because it can leads to a wet dream as happened today morning. I’m feeling better despite of it and just feel like shame and anxious for some reason. Nightfalls always happen when you don’t expect for them.