I’m done with PM.
I spend a fucking day only M’ing. Wtf.
PM is bad because:
- I waste hours with it (around 120 days (24h) up to now!!!)
- I’m getting dependent on it
- It makes me want to kill myself
- It damages my natural reward system
I’m not going to M anymore. Never ever again. I won’t do it.
If I want to PM I tell myself: It’s ok that I want to PM, it’s normal after years of addiction. I have the choice, I can choose freely. PM destroys me, wastes my time and damages my reward system. That’s why I choose not to PM, but instead focus on living the life I want to live: One of freedom and honesty!
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I don’t understand how the shame and guilt is not good?
But I’m very angry at myself. I’m too used about knowing better but still doing it wrong…
Just reminding myself of the reasons I do not watch porn and masturbate:
- It’s a goddamn waste of my time
- it damages my reward system
- it makes me compulsive
- it makes me loose selfrespect
- it feeds a very disgusting image of womens
- it makes me feel ashamed
I’m very happy, one week completed and working on my app 
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Hi there.
I’m feeling low since some days. I feel empty, devoid of meaning. Just imagine you reached all your goals and now had nothing to do anymore. That’s how I feel.
Just that I didn’t really reach all my goals. I’m two weeks now and slowly I think that Porn and Masturbation isn’t even that bad, that all that negative consequences are a little exaggerated…
I’ll go through them in the next few days, just to make sure that I cannot rationalize myself into relapsing. I need to know it, have to thought out everything, then there’s no possibility of relapse. Relapse is not going to occur if I know why I am a Nofapper.
I already was there once, on day 53 and I relapsed because… well, …I thought why not.
So:
It’s a goddamn waste of my time:
I probably spend an hour/day fapping/watching porn. On average. Probably more, maybe less. That’s a fucking 3’285 hours (since age 12 when I discovered porn, I don’t even want to count that rub myself on the bed and feel good faps as a nine year old boy). This equals to 136 days!!! Holy guacamole!
And in the last few months in which I discovered weird fetishes this time probably increased. I might only have watched porn and fapped each third day or so, but (depending on when I started) then I fapped for 3 hours + or even more!!! (Thank you, random tantra-orgasm-without-ejaculation-edge-for-hours coach from youtube!!) Also I spend probably an hour on searching the right image, the right angle, the right I don’t even know what. And holy shit I even paid for fucking porn. Only around 10 bucks, but still wtf. And the hours I spend searching for premiumfiledonwloaders to get that file you would have to pay for… And those countless torrents I donwloaded only to delete it immideately after realizing the clip isn’t that good…
It’s a FUCKING waste of time!
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I think the waste of time is one of strongest reasons to avoid PMO. I only realize this when started to do Nofap and redirected my time to productive activities. So it wasn’t my main motivation when I decided to do it.
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