(18 F) Journey Through the Dark

That is nice :slightly_smiling_face:

I wish u a nice day 2!
Beste

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Long time no see!
After some long breaks to put my life together, I find myself on what I hope is the upside of this addiction. Even though I still fantasize, I deleted social media and swear off chocolate for the rest of the day I google up anything triggering.
As a new college student and girlfriend, I’m doing my best to be the best I can be in both situations. Now that I have a boyfriend, I’m more motivated than ever to leave this addiction behind and conquered so I can be the girl he needs. :heart_eyes::sparkling_heart:
As a Christian, I’ve been listening to God more, trying to do what He wants me to do, not struggle in sin.
I’m already at day 37, and I have no plans of relapsing yet. If I did I would be in trouble.

To anyone reading this:
You got this!! I believe in you!!

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Thats a wonderful proposition sister. May God give you the strength to fight all the odds. Even my girlfriend is with me in my struggle from the last 2 years. Though, I have let her down every single time in this period :pensive:.
But now I pledge to give her the man she fell for, she loves. :slightly_smiling_face:

May we both win in this battle for the person we love.

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Well, it’s day one of school and I’m worried. I’m tired and ovulating and have urges during class. :expressionless: I can’t say I didn’t see this coming.
But I’m at day 40 today, that’s ten days away from my record. I want to get to 90, which is when I’ll buy myself Minecraft. Whenever I have an urge I imagine myself playing Minecraft with my best friend and my boyfriend. That makes me feel better. But there are so many times during (online) class I just want to reach down and satisfy the urge… I know it won’t, though. It’ll just come back stronger and I’ll waste an entire day on that. I can’t do that, not after 40 days of abstinence.
I’m going to keep praying I’ll make it through today, even though it’s rough.

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It was hard but I made it to day 40!! :clap::clap::smile::tada::confetti_ball: I fought my urges and I’m proud.

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You did a great job, sis. Keep going and break your records.

:fire::fire:

We all are proud of you. :clap::clap:

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I don’t know you know this or not but you can download the full game for free from internet.

Thank you for your support!! :sparkling_heart:

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Hm. I didn’t actually know that… I’ll still wait till 90 but where would I go to get it free?

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I’s just get it from the minecraft website. It’s more trustworthy that way because it’s the official website. I love minecraft! You’ll love the game so don’t give in. I’ve been playing for like 8 years now lol

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That’s awesome! I’ve heard a lot about it for 8 years and I’m really excited to get to play. Hopefully I will in 50 days. :laughing:

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I entered the 90 Challenge, and that makes today 41 of 90. I’m starting to get nervous since my highest recorded streak is 50 and I’m coming up there fast. I’m starting to worry I’ll lose motivation if I get there… I’m worried I’ll mess it up for the second time in a row. Together that’s 100 days I will have spent getting to that point and I don’t want to throw all that time away again. I’m having urges but I need to get past 50 at the very least. This is my second chance to do what I should have done last time. I’m gonna stay strong, and focus on one day at a time. :muscle:

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Gets so much easier as the days move.

77 days and counting. Stick to what you know, and how to recognize the urges/triggers. Turn and connect with God daily. I certainly have turned to Him more each day and that number climbs.

You got this!

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Hello. Thank you for sharing your experience. In some categories of P, people tend to Fantasize too much. But, When You are Man, It’s harder. Stay strong.

@Steve461
Thank you for the encouragement! Congratulations on your streak!!

@jmmpa12
Of course! You stay strong too!
I can’t say I agree it’s harder for men… I think women have it pretty hard too with ovulation and everything. I know we don’t have a scientific reason really for doing MO, but it’s still a struggle to combat it. The temptation is still there.

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Day 45 of 90!!! :confetti_ball:
50 is my highest recorded streak. This week I will beat that and am still feeling motivated!! After my last relapse I have been feeling very motivated to get to 90 and over. I have a reason to fight and am sick of this addiction. I feel like every day is getting me closer to my goal. I’m still having urges but my willpower to beat them is stronger than my urge to relapse.
I did have a wet dream last night and those usually result in a relapse, but not so this time. This time I just accepted it and moved on. I didn’t linger on it. I’m doing fine without MO. I’m starting to feel like a normal person again, like I did before MO. Everything is going to be alright.
My thinking is still a little messed up, though. On my date today I had some thoughts about my boyfriend I’m not super proud of… But so many thoughts go through my head on a daily basis that I felt like I couldn’t really control that. I just had to block them out and focus on what he was saying. 🙍 Any thoughts on this experience, @ChristianMan ? Or whoever wants to reply. I feel like that’s understandable after what I’ve been doing for the last 7 years but it still scared me. I never chose to think that.
Otherwise I’m still going strong! That’s just another motive to end this nonsense.

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I honestly still get thoughts about my girlfriend… I had some today. This furiates me which is what caused me to start my 90 days challenge. I hate them. I want them gone. And it pisses me off that eventually I’ll have to tell her I thought about these things. Idk how to stop them. Because I can’t. Just don’t dwell in them or you’ll regret it. You can’t stop a bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from building a nest on your head.

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Are you sure this shouldn’t be your motto? :joy: Jk, but a good point.
Thank you for being open and giving me some advice! Good to know I’m not alone. Yeah, that’s all true. Infuriates me too. But we shalln’t dwell on this and we shall make it through this phase and these thoughts will be gone!
Shoot… Never thought about telling him… :flushed:

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I already did. I had to after I fell from my 1.25 year long streak. I hadn’t thought about telling about it to her before but at that moment I knew she deserved to know.
It was very difficult and uneasy to bring it in front of her. She didn’t say anything at first but she was understanding after she’d taken her own time (5 mins😅) to understanding what I was dealing with.

Granted, not everyone will react like that. But I think they do deserve to know. If it affects us, it will sooner or later affect them too.
I personally was in favor of not telling her and eliminating this problem completely on my own. But after my last fall, I chose differently
I’d say both of you must open up to your respective partners. You’d be surprised at comforting their support can be.

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