Day 1. Already passed. Studied for about 14 hours today. Was a bit bored at times but refrained from masturbating or chatting around.
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14 hours straight? Thatâs a lot of hours⌠are you in college ?
I was, didnât study that much there though. I am from India. I used to study a lot for college entrance, got admission in best college in India (IIT Bombay) at 16, things went too fast. Now studying to have another chance at great opportunity. Sort of. I have high ambitions, and I come from low middle class family, so got to compensate only way I can.
Masturbation took some of my crucial times at college, I used to spend upto an hour into it everyday. Now rebuilding things. I didnât want to be an engineer also, though I love maths. So college was not too exciting for me academically.
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Day 3, working out well. Life is in control. No urges so far.
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Wish you the best⌠day 12 here taking my license in 3 days
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The biggest thing pushing me away from masturbation is nothing about physical fitness or such beliefs. I want to be invulnerable, porn has been a huge vulnerability.
My girl friend could point at it anytime and pretend like she is the better person. Itâs also like if someone takes my laptop or phone I feel insecure. So I can live with no masturbation, atleast no porn, and regulated masturbation for the goal of earning respect.
This is the worst part, the porn has been my vulnerability and even my identity for many people, which is very undesirable thing and it hurts more than temporary pleasures of day. So I work for building my life.
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Itâs frustrating when we fail. We look at things to blame. The brain is a simple thing, yet so complicated. Was depressed yesterday, thinking about future. Life I want to live, will it be worth it without her if I let her go. Achievements are worldly, people are personal. It hurts, still not sure what to do.
Anyway, yesterday this ended up with drawing my frustration on masturbation, anger, and stuff. Broke the streak, but today I was having clear mind. Still, much clarity is when we are least bothered with things that havenât happened or decisions that are rational. Controlling the brain is the difficult part. I always think atleast masturbating is better than chronic drinking or smoking to draw out frustration. But I feel that same argument can be given by drinker, for drugs and drug abuser for injections.
Best is to have control over life and live in peace. So simple to think, this idea is creation of same brain which gets frustrated later. So simple but yet complicated.
This year, I am fighting a triple sided war. No fap, Topping the upsc exam, Developing great physique.
To fulfill my physical and mental potential. This is last chance for me to achieve the life I believe I deserve. There are disappointments, often in form of disinterest to trigger porn, or movies. But I want to prevail.
Today will be my all time high of 3 days since joining rewire a month back. Wonât masturbate in October, in this month. Will never watch porn or search things which are disrespectful in social open life.
You have to suffer & take a beating of lifetime to finaly be successful at nofap. The Task is of extreme difficulty but not impossible. KEEP RISING UP. may glory be yours
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Thanks! I will not fail now at any cost
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@Navosh JOIN âFAPSTRONAUTSâ whatsapp group. We can help you out broâŚYou can find the topic in âFORUMââŚGOD BLESS YOU
Soon enough, the battles of the world are not won by the strongest or the ones with shining armour but the ones who never give up, rise up after every fall believing tomorrow will be better.
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I donât use WhatsApp now a days bro
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Struggle is a part of life. When I will be old, with little to do the whole day, I will miss the failings and struggle of this youth, I believe. So I cherish the fall and rise, for I believe, this is part of life and adventure.
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Day 3 today. This will not stop now. Better me, stronger me.
Day 4, 12 hours. Will improve further. One year to go
I look upto tomorrow with a great leap forward. Day 5 and beyond. Wonât look back, no more opportunities lost. Balls gonna be upto themselves. I truly want to rewire myself to success. I need it very badly. One whole year of hard work in life may be, maximum hard work in life. About 350 days more.
If you wanna do 350 days,
Say it like this About remaining life days more
350 days for next year exam. I wonât stop with no fap there ofcourse, but that is the goal in sight. I am taking this as overall challenge to make life better.
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349 days more of hard work. Today 13.5 hrs. Wasted some time in evening, missed a target. Need to get better. Hope from tomorrow. No time for urges, just work bitch, for this 1 year. Maybe I can change my destiny and be better than what my future trajectory looks like, in auto pilot.
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