This is my NF diary
Day 5
I’m 25
I had watched PMO since my 15s . it ghass become I really bad habit for me, effected everything on my life, I have problems interacting with people, with my studies and with my father (that has been even childish than am Iz and he keeps doing stuff on purpose to make everyone mad at him. I used it to relieve my stress, feel loved and get through really depressing stages of my life.
I starting again trying to last 90 days, I already manage to last a month, but I need to keep pushing further.
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nice bro… keep it going for better future!
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Day 6
Each time i try to quit gap usually I became dumb, i m unable to think correctly and sometimes I start babbling nonsense, I bet a bunch of you had passed from the same thing. Its hard.
In the info I search in the internet they always mention to hang out with friends or with your love partner, that’s good but I don’t have any of those. Do exercise sounds like the best option, the only bad part is that each time weather starts to get rainy or close to that, my body starts to hurt a bunch. (Sorry about this bad phrases, seriously I’m doing the best I can). Ahhhh, I bet exactly when two weeks pass I probably will be OK again. But I’m starting to had doubts I don’t know if I should stop fappening for 90 days or start doing once in a week or two just using my imagination. Probably it will be better after 90 days considering that its an addiction.
I have to keep fighting.
Relapsed after 30/days
I didn’t feel guilt but I felt something worst Grosss, while I was exposing myself to those things, I felt nothing but wanting to vomit, for how much gross it was, you see after I decided to start again, I put a mental message in my hate just saying, all PMO related stuff “Its gross” and it work as plan. I imagined that I wasn’t gonna last more than a month, so I decide this plan in order to see how useless is jerking off.
It works, I feel so happy now.
Now phase two.
60 days.
See you in 2 months.
PS: my bad is in 30 Oct
I need this isn’t a social media, but I’m so grateful to all of you.
I’ll appreciate some motivation or inspirational words.
Bye.
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Accept the pain that quiting pmo will bring its not really worth it if you don’t go through struggle let me be yourbmotivation and others I went through sleep paralysis, I had sleepless nights, I went through headaches, I got fevers but still I keep pushing, I am almost finishing a year now,
You probably asking yourself is it even worth it?
My answer is the results are worth more than diamond and gold brother, I can easily interact with my mother this days I can manage to stay calm through some of the most stresfull times now, I can think things through although I still do struggle with sexual thoughts, but I am 99% enjoying the benefits will be on nofap forever though I will never watch porn or masturbate ever again in my life, that was very hard decision for me to make begin this year I couldn’t farthom leaving all that lust behind me but once I accepted that if I leave porn aka lust I will be free, i decided never to watch or fap again. I hope you can come to terms with yourself it will truly set you free mick, keep fighting this is my code 01e5aa.
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Restarting again my counter.
Day 3
I was careless and neglecting the facts that capping was ruining my achievements once again until now I only manage to reach a month every time I decided to quit it.
I feel like I only now how to destroy myself, I want to cry, I’m so itchy (obvious reasons) and I don’t want to be burden to anyone, it doesn’t help either may lack of contact with other people outside the phone ( I haven’t been doing that for a while either)
I need help, a hug and remember my dreams.
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Day 4 im being such a mad person today exploting with rage for every single thing that happens to me, I’m so confuse to not hearing well, not eating well, don’t wanting anything, all the same process over again, the pain is so much, I feel like a monster 
and I so sleepy it doesn’t stop, but its almost impossible sleeping well due to my hunger and the constant heatwaves over here ( that’s an odd one now) 
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Day 5
Im in a better humor, but food still feel disgusting and heavy for me and I’m still very sleepy, but I decide it to not give up, and start with small goals like a week, 12 days, 15, 18, 21, 24 until I finish my fight against lust. Alzó i watched some ted videos to oriented myself.
Actualy when we go on nofap; we unlock pandora box
{ pandora box = past pain & sufferings which we add up to ourself }
We fapped to run away from sufferings. So they keep on adding up. Thats why first month is like HELL.
You can survive this hell; i believe in you.
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This reminded me of a primary school story. 
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we unlock pandora box
That reminds me of a manga and a character from a series.
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Day 6
I can concentrate better but still having problem to remember things, worst part of this is that I was watching a series yesterday that I watched as a kid and due to this problems I cannot ended because it has a sexy female character (mermaid style). But well after a few days I hope that isn’t a problem I really want to finish that, because I didn’t understand it well back then.
I starting to recover my like for food and put block even in my cellphone.
I would had go to exercise but I’m recovering from a very long walk from the last Sunday, since a little farm neighborhood until a TV station (a little mountain)
Day 7
I feel so sad now, for all the times I relapse and act like an idiot to everyone I care, because I always thing that everyone is plotting something against me, I know it isn’t like that but I had the bad luck to always get around of really mean people, that’s why I had always problems socializing with others, I’m always afraid and feeling lonely, that’s why im always end up doing it, I bet tones of people here had gone true to similar things, I really want to let this go I feel like a caged beast. Im still angry. Im tired of this im always hace to fight this alone, i need to really resurrect like Gandalf.
Day 8
Feeling angry, but very motivated to do more things I manage to do a little walk with some knees exercises, I played with a ball and manage to buy a jacket a need for a trip. Anyway my reactions still have a late time of response, I’m still will the emptyness in my head but know I can focus on accomplishing small goals.
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Day 9
Now I start to see how everything isn’t as hard as it used to be, my memories are still feeling blurry, but I’m starting to reconnect them, I really want to be OK with myself and not been the party pooper or the angry guy that everyone is afraid to talk because he always looks angry even when he isnt angry. I want to success I want to become a biogist, I want to draw again, I want to inspire others to be better, I want to not feel sleepy every time I read a book.
Thanks for been a support, the true is I don’t have many friends and most of the ones I have are my sister’s friends and the others are just online chat friends ( usually those doesn’t last long).
Ahhhh its really hard but this is the reason why my life get misslead in the first place.
Day 10
Being attacked by a full attack or vicious habits from the people starting the holidays, if any of you are familiar with the reggeaton or merengue, you may get me.
I can’t even enter my own room because of that and because I get super stressed in a class during the morning. Feeling for time super depressed to be unable to do anything. But I know that my reward will be great: being able to do everything that is possible for my will and my hands, draw my future, observe my pation and create my legacy, be strong brothers and sisters (wink) we can all defeat this or we can get even stronger!
Glory to this amazing universe!
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